Guardian Angel 7#

~

for some reason her stomach fluttered as she got up the following morning.

she felt an urge to finish her morning rutine faster than usual,

which meant she was in exeptionally good time when she sat down to eat her breakfast,

the last thing she did before leaving. her mother came into the kitchen and stopped in the middle of a yawn to look at her and laugh.

"worried you might be late again?" she asked as she reached for a coffee cup.

iz flushed a bright red and looked at her tea mug. "yeah" she said, positive that she was lying.

but she didn't know the cause for it, until she found herself running toward the train station,

her jacket under her arm and her boots barely on. she sighed and slowed to a walk, a fast walk,

and concidered the effect this total stranger now had on her.

she shook her head at her self and forced her feet to move more slowly.

as she walked through the doors and found herself standing in front of the stairs her stomach was dancing.

she felt like she might be sick, and wondered why the feeling wasn't pleasant as it had been in her dream.

 was she so nervous to see him again that it was making her sick? she wondered. 

she walked slowly up the stairs, expecting him to show up any minute.

but when she reached the end of stairs there was no sign of him, let alone anyone.

she was so early that none of the people who usually took the train had bothered to arrive at the station yet.

her lower lip pushed out into a pout as she went to sit on one of the benches,

putting her jacket on and tying her boots properly, feeling the cold of the morning now.

she tried to control the crushing feeling of dissapointment that filled her body

and was focusing very hard on fighting the very unnecessary

and quite embarresing tears that were under way, when she felt a thump on the bench she was sitting on.

someone had sat down next to her. she peered out through her hair to make sure this person wasn't looking at her,

 concerned about her obvious mood and her breath caught in her throat.

next to her on this old, rusty and half broken bench was something out of a fairytale.

extremely pale skin, a honey colored hairdo that was a bit messy compared to the white shirt

and the beige coat that was standing open, dispite the cold.

and as this person turned to look at her, something in her fell into place.

the beautiful pale blue eyes seemed to look right through her and into her at the same time.

seemed to know everything she was thinking and feeling,

which made it so embarresing to look at them, made her flush hard,

but even so she didn't look away. she was caught and there was nothing to do.

unless he became awkward by the situation

and what could only be a dumpfonded expression on her face, the stare she was locked in,

and looked away, there was nothing she could do. and he didn't look away.

his mouth turned up into a crooked smile and he seemed to understand this wierd facination she had with him.

when he looked away, possibly realising she wasn't able to, she sucked in a huge breath and tried to calm her racing puls.

she could feel it so hard in her skull it was almost a migrane.

"hi" he said, as if he hadn't noticed any of her odd bahavior.

"hi" she breathed unable to do any better than repeat what he said.

she focused to hard on her breathing, trying to make it even and normal,

that she didn't notice until it was too late that he had moved closer to her. she felt dizzy, almost faint.

"how are you this morning?" he didn't look at her as he spoke,

which made it easier for her to respond normally, not beeing hypnotized by his eyes.

she pulled herself together enough to give him an answer that was more than one syllable.

"better, i got up at the right time this morning". he smiled a bit.

"so no bumping into people on the stairs?" she wondered idly where this conversation was going.

"no, not today" she exhaled slowly. he was only inches away,

almost touching his thigh to hers on the bench.

the morning air seemed to help clear her head for a second

and she plucked up the courage to turn her head toward him and look him in the eyes.

big mistake. "i'm glad" he smiled and her stomach twisted.

it was easier to look at him 3rd time, but she still wanted to pass out in his lap.

"how come i've never seen you here before?" she asked,

logic finally overpowering all the stupid emotions clouding her head.

"i just moved here" he said, looking away from her again,

releasing her from the hypnotics of his eyes. she took a deep breath, not sure when she'd get the opportunity again.

"oh" was all she could manage. a train rolled in behind them, and he got up.

he was going the opposite direction. she felt her lower lip betraying her, as she fighted not to sulk again.

at least till' he was gone. "maybe i'll see you tomorrow" he smiled and seemed to release all his hypnotic powers on her.

she opened her mouth slightly but nothing came out, so she nodded like an incompetent moron

and he turned to enter his train. as soon as he was out of sight,

she put her head between her knees and focused on her breathing, making sure she remembered how.

~

Guardian Angel 6#

~

"freja?" she whispered into her phone. "yeah, who's this?"

she immediately felt guilty when she heard the sleepyness in freja's voice.

"i'm so sorry i woke you, i just can't sleep. i had the wierdest dream"

she heard her voice shake as she realized it was just a dream.

"what was it about?" she could hear freja tring to make an effort to wake up and pay attention.

she felt gratefull, even though she never payed much attention to what freja had to say. 

she made a mental note; that would have to change.

"that boy i met. i don't know why but i'm completely obsessed with him!"

she heard freja yawn. "iz, you don't even know who this guy is. how come he has such an effect on you?"

she looked at the ceiling. "i don't know" she mused.

"look, i'm sorry i woke you. i don't even know why i called. go back to sleep, i'll see you tomorrow."

even though she was fighting to hear the rest, freja gave in pretty easy at the sight of a little more sleep before school.

after she hung up the phone, she got up and went downstairs.

it was still pitch black outside.

she put some water over to boil and sat on the kitchen table looking out into the darkness.

far away in thought, she suddenly caught sight of something white outside.

she shook her head and tried to focus on the white. it looked like the cat from earlier.

 a cute little white cat was dancing around on the fence separating their yard and the neighbors.

she pulled her knees up under her chin and smiled a little,

watching the cat looking facinated at the small white fluffs floating down from the sky,

as if it had never seen snow before. the cat suddenly sat down and turned toward her,

it's eyes a beautiful pale blue colour. her heart stopped for a second as she was staring at the cat.

it's not possible she thought, but she was on her feet so fast that she lost her balance for a second,

and scrambled to the window to get a better look. the cat hadn't reacted at all to her sudden movement,

it just looked at her with it's surreal blue eyes. she sucked in a huge breath,

realizing she'd stopped breathing. it's insane she thought as she ran to get her jacket and stuck her barefeet into her boots.

she opened the door, and spun 'round the house to get to the side where the fence and the kitchen window was,

and paused at soon as she rounded the house.

the cat made an elegant jump down the fence and placed itself in front of it, still looking at her.

she carefully closed the distance between them, squatted and reached out to touch it.

it's fur was incredibly soft, and the cat began purring under her touch, never closing it's eyes.

"you're just a cute cat aren't you?" she wispered trying to calm herself

and let go of her wild imagination that had jumped to conclutions

that had nearly given her a heart attack.

"you just have the most beautful eye color" she whispered and looked the cat straight in the eye.

she felt dizzy, like she was going to loose her balance. her head spun, but she couldn't look away.

she felt a sudden tingle in her fingers that made her break the gaze, and the contact.

she removed her hand a bit to quickly and the cat ran off, probably startled by her sudden movement.

she lumped onto the cold asphalt unable to hold her balance any longer.

what is happening to me? she thought for a second,

then pulled herself together and wondered back into the house, not sure what had just happened.

it was just a cat, she kept telling herself. but some part of her refused to believe it.

~

Guardian Angel 5#

~

in a blurry mess of colours and bright light, she recognized the cat from the fence that evening.
she reached out to touch it, trying to hold on to something familiar,
but slipped and watched the cat strech out of her reach. she wanted to cry.
"wait!" she cried and it eccoed out in the space she was in, even though she couldn't see any walls around her.
she tried to grab on to something, anything, but found herself slipping further and further.
she heard a boyish laugh from somewhere around her and her eyes began to water.
there was no point in screaming. it was coming for her and she knew it,
even though she was still dreaming. she had all but accepted it,
when something grabbed her wrist and pulled her up. she tried to see what or who,
but the bright colours blinded her and made the water in her eyes spill over.
tears of joy now. who was saving her from the darkness and the nothing?
the crushing agony she knew she would wake up to, if she had continued to fall seemed far away.
 suddenly she recognized the pale blue colour that glowed at her, smiling,
even though she hadn't made out the rest of the face yet, let alone the mouth.
she knew exactly who this was, and yet she didn't.
she stared at him, with her mouth open, as he pulled her to a stand before him,
and smiled a breathtaking smile at her. she felt like fainting,
but realized quickly she couldn't fall any deeper with him here. he'd catch her. that made her heart ache a bit.
but in a good way. she smiled embarressed, wondering if he could tell. 
"who are you?" she asked, her voice small and fragile. but he just smiled and took her hand.
she felt the rush in her fingers, but did not yank her hand away, though it would have been a very normal reaction for her.
to run from the rush and what she knew came after it. but it felt nice.
in his warm hands, the rush felt almost good.
she shook her head once in disbelief and then gave in to the feeling.
she close her eyes and felt the rush moving from her fingers to her arms,
further up through her chest and fall like a waterfall down through her stomach all the way to her toes.
she sighed in relief. this was very different than the rush she was used to.
the scary thought of waking up to what normally came after the rush was gone.
mellowness had taken it's place and she was comeplete.
there was no other word for it. she opened her eyes ver slowly to find him still standing right in front of her,
just looking at her cautiously. she smiled, too preoccupied to take in his expression.
"don't go" she whispered and closed her eyes, and suddenly the rush dissapeared. 
quicker than it had manifestet it self, it was gone. like someone had turned of a switch, 
and when she opened her eyes, she was sitting upright in her bed starring at the room in front of her.
"damn" she breathed and lay back in the bed. that was new.
~

Guardian Angel 4#

~

"hi mum" she shouted as she closed the door behind her and threw her bag on the floor.
"hi iz" she followed her mothers voice to the kitchen.
she sat on the kitchen table and handed her mother the knife from the jar behind her,
that she was pointing at. "how was your day?" her mum took another tomato and sliced it into tiny cubes.
"strange" she admitted, stealing a tomato and putting it in her mouth before her mum noticed it was gone.
"how so?" her mum asked. she thought about that for a second.
"i just met a boy this morning, and he had the strangest eyes. beautiful, but strange".
she looked out the window and caught sight of a cat sitting on the fence,
trying to catch snowflakes with it's paw, and almost loosing balance doing so.
her mum giggled, stealing her interest. "sounds interesting",
she mused and pushed iz down the kitchen table and asked her to set the table.
she was unusually quiet at the dinner table,
and without thinking she started cleaning up after dinner, which she never did voluntarily.
all the time she was thinking about his eyes. wondering, and now hoping, that she would see them again.
to see if he would still have the same effect on her as the first time.
by the time she changed into her pyjamas and crawled under the duvet,
she had all but forgotten the beautiful colour, and was instantly sad.
she turned a few times in her bed, before she decided to watch some tv,
seeing as sleeping wasn't an option. zapping through channels she stopped a little to long at a movie about love,
where two people were sitting half naked in a bed promising each other to love one another until the day they died.
it made her feel a little sick and she turned the tv off and stared at the ceiling.
this was not going to help her dreams tonight.
she felt a small rush of blood in her fingers and immediately panicked.
she closed her eyes and focused all her energy on non-love related thoughts.
slowly the rush in her fingers dissapeared and she sighed in relief.
it was better to avoid it.
she knew what would happen if she let the rush spread,
and it was not pleasant or pretty in any way.
finally she felt the sleepyness finding her eyes and she gladly gave into a hopefully dreamless sleep.
~

Guardian Angel 3#

~
she was chewing absentmindedly on the end of her pencil, daydreaming,
when the book slammed onto her table and made her jump and look up.
"am i interrupting you ms. ericson?" mrs. clein asked and pushed her glasses impossibly further up her nose.
"no, mrs. clein, i'm sorry". she blushed and looked down in her book,
trying to avoid further attention. the rest of the class laughed,
some snickered and her heart sank. just what she needed, more negative attention.
the rest of the day she kept to herself. still captivated by her strange incounter that morning.
it wasn't untill lunch that she decided to push the thought to the back of her mind and be a part of the real world,
for at least half-an hour. she could do that for freja.
she had only just made in into the kantine when freja stood up and waved her over.
she had been waiting. that meant something had happened, important to freja and normally also to her,
but today she wasn't to eager to listen to freja. she wanted to fantasize and dream.
she sat down across freja and the table and smiled inviting. "so what happened?" she smiled,
and took a sip of water, preparing herself.
freja smiled a too eager smile and lauched the story about how william had bumped into her in gym
and that she was almost certain that he did it on purpose.
when freja was done, and had been satisfied with a comment here and there and "uh"' and "ah"s at the right places,
she tried to tell her. "i met a boy this morning" she started
and wondered how to continue without sounding like a lovestruck teenager or an insane person.
"and he had the most bizarre eyes". "how so?" freja asked,
genuenlly interested and she felt bad for not listening to freja's story with more intensity.
"they sort of.. glowed? i don't know how else to describe it?".
freja giggled. "sounds wierd iz, you sure he didn't have some disease or something?
i've heard of one that makes your eyes like glassy and look like they're about to pop out of your skull".
freja chewed thoughtfully on her apple while speaking. she thought about that.
"no i'm pretty sure that he didn't have a disease". freja looked up at her,
"sounds like me made quite an impression?" she smiled.
"i guess he did" she answered and wondered for a second if she'd ever see him again.
~

Guardian Angel 2#

suddenly she remembered what the time must be and flung herself of the bed.
"damn it, damn it" she mumbled to herself while she threw a brush through her wild blond hair,
to keep it from looking like a haystack and forced herself to eat a croissant.
she threw her stuff in her bag,
and ran to get her coat with a little piece of croissant sticking out of her mouth still.
her mother laughed and had her scarf ready for her.
"oversleep again?" she laughed as her daugther spun around in circles to make the scarf,
her mother was holding in her hands,
twist dellecately around her neck.
"yeah, i keep having this dream" she answered while rushing for the door,
"see you later mum, love you!" she smiled a brilliant smile
and caught an unconditional love in her mothers eyes before she closed the door behind her.
it made her feel warm against the cold breeze that snarled at her as she stepped outside.
as she ran for the train her focus was mainly on finding her purse and making sure she had her ticket,
and when she didn't find it she panicked, but didn't slow down.
and even though it shouldn't,
it came as a shock to her when she smashed into something on her way up the stairs to the train station.
she was so startled she lost her feet for a second and fell flat on her face on the stairs.
"oh my god, i'm so sorry!"
she started and looked up to see who or what she had run into and was suddenly caught.
not by anything psysically,
but she found herself mesmerized by a beautiful pale blue colour radiating from a pair of eyes,
even though she wasn't sure at first that they were eyes. 
they glowed in such a way that it took her a second to place them on the face of a beautiful blonde, pale boy.
she immediately blushed and scrambled to get her stuff back into her bag.
he bent down in front of her and handed her her calender,
she looked up at him again only to realize to late it was a mistake.
his eyes held her hostage as he spoke: "don't worry about it, in a hurry?"
it took her a second to answer: "yeah, i overslept".
she tried awkwardly to get on her feet and must have seemed a bit of balance,
cus' he took her hand and pulled her to a stand. "yeah that happens" he said and smiled for the first time.
her heart stood still for a second but it was enough for her to feel dizzy,
but oddly not in a bad way. she closed her eyes to gain some focus and to avoid his tender eyes.
"i .. um.. i hope your ok, i have a train to catch" she pointed in direction of the platform.
she had to force herself to keep her eyes of his eyes while looking at him to say a polite goodbye,
her eyes wanted to find his and be mesmerized, but she had to keep her cool,
and whatever dignity she had left. "sure", he smiled and noticed she wasn't making eyecontact anymore,
"have a nice day then" he breathed and smiled a brilliant white smile that took her breath away.
she inhaled deeply as soon as she could only to realize his breath was in the air and it startled her a bit.
his breath actually left a taste in the air. almost sweet.
she shook it of and smiled halfheartedly at him before running to catch her train.
as soon as the doors closed behind her she slid down in a seat and put her head between her knees.
people around her looked at her nervously as if they were worried she might be sick,
but she could have told them that that was far from how she felt.
she grinned silently to herself. what was that? she wanted to ask, but who was there to ask.
~

Guardian Angel 1#

she sat up in her bed, sweat on her forehead. another dream.
the same dream that had haunted her for weeks now.
she breathed and tried to calm herself.
it wasn't a bad dream, but it was so vivid she had trouble knowing when the dream had ended.
she was so sure it was real. she put a cold hand on her face and closed her eyes.
oh how she wished it would be true.
she pushed herself of the bed and went to sit in the window sill.
there was nothing in the darkness outside,
but she lingered there a long time before she finally tired and went back to bed.
still not knowing what she was searching for.
~